Daily Photos

< December 2010 >

December 1, 2010
The optical illusion she`s painting didn`t look precisely right to me. `You have to be shorter,` she explained. Therapy Cafe. Jazz singing hasn`t gone out of style. Those who are gifted with a good voice can make music without having to learn to play complicated instruments. Keeping the jazz tradition alive.

December 2, 2010
The last of its kind. `Maybe we should`ve set up the recruiting table inside.` Blame the cat. Who gets to shovel the window? I`m sure you remember this photo from March 22, 2010. Coincidentally, I noticed this sign just as the violinist was walking past. She was surprised to see herself on it.

December 3, 2010
I see a lot of faces like this as finals week approaches. Christmas speed trap. Rain sculpture by Terry Welker. Yes, of course I`m going to EAT it. Reminds me of an airport screening.

December 4, 2010
Everybody`s got two elbows. Might as well use `em. His coach watches from the bench, amazed at his talent. SWISH! `Dunno why I had to come out in the first place.` `You might want to cross half court before you shoot.`

December 5, 2010
I`m ready to break into the office furniture catalog market. Waiting for someone special. And waiting . . . and waiting. Miss Ohio International was worth waiting for. Now I`m not saying that my photos of her on November 7, 2010, had anything to do with her being named beauty queen, but it just seems too great a coincidence to ignore. Congratulations and best wishes to a deserving winner!

December 6, 2010
For today`s craft project, you will need a toothpick, some twist ties, green sticks or stems, and lotsa lotsa cash. Use the toothpick to roll the corners of each bill inward. Fold the bill across the width. Put a twist tie in the crease. Fold the bill along the length and twist the tie once. This creates a pair of `petals.` Using the twist ties, connect three pairs of petals to each stem to create a `money flower.` Now . . . who is it for?

December 7, 2010
I went to a great deal of trouble to take this boring photo, so you`re going to admire it now. Taking the previous photo, I backed into this intercom and discovered that UD`s 9-1-1 system works very well. Miraculous signs help the wise men find their way. Now you see it. Now you don`t.

December 8, 2010
Money flowers ready to be delivered (see December 6 above). Will the Prize Patrol be coming to YOUR house? This is what will happen to you if you don`t keep moving. Something can be hand delivered to your friend`s house for less than fifty cents. Miraculous. Only the most tasteful and sophisticated families use Adam Alonzo photographs on their Christmas cards. My small collection of Christmas music leans heavily toward jazz.

December 9, 2010
Don`t stick your tongue on that! `What did you think of that exam?` `QUACK QUACK!` `What did you put for question 3?` `QUACK QUACK!` Seconds later, she nearly dropped this string of giant ornaments onto unsuspecting students on the first floor. You can put up all the signs you want, but if you`re on his naughty list he`s not coming. Portrait of the artist.

December 10, 2010
Congratulations to jazz singer Rick Evans for receiving a Lifetime Achievement award from the Montgomery County Arts and Cultural District. A well-intentioned present, but destined for re-gifting. I couldn`t find a partridge in a pear tree, so you get this. Frost warning tonight: bundle up your utility poles. He flies through the air with the greatest of ease.

December 11, 2010
It`s not JUST the flying girl that makes this photo. It`s the two in the corners, like cherubs in a Renaissance painting. Norman Rockwell would`ve gladly painted this face. Did Brigitte Bardot have a granddaughter? The Nutcracker this ain`t. Today`s photos have been brought to you by Suave hair control products.

December 12, 2010
For me, the Christmas season begins when I attend the Kettering Children`s Choir concert every December. The littlest angel. Why buy a professionally-produced DVD when you can shoot a shaky video yourself from the absolute last row? If I was greedy, I could make a killing off of parents who can`t get pictures like this with their ordinary cameras. Stopping by woods on a snowy evening. I drove to the concert by an unusual route, choosing to avoid one big, curving hill in favor of smaller hills that go straight down.

December 13, 2010
It`s final exam week, and students tend to fail the clean-up-after-yourself test. Winter is death. Spring is resurrection. Yes, snow really is blue (see December 6, 2007, for an explanation). That would be me. Your names here, if you want to be tacky for all eternity.

December 14, 2010
The team name was spelled a bit differently when I went to that school: C-R-U-S-A-D-E-R-S. `Here, let us help you with that.` Taking it strong to the hoop, he got the basket and a foul. The NBA and NCAA didn`t need me tonight, so I shot JV. It`s not about the final score, it`s about teamwork and good sportsmanship. In other words, they lost.

December 15, 2010
Fun with a laser pointer. Remember the stargate sequence from the film `2001`? Gotta work on my penmanship. And yes, this is a photo. I hadn`t taken any disturbing self-portraits lately, so I thought it was time. This is not a Photoshop creation; it`s what the camera saw (green light, red laser and me). I am not responsible for any bad dreams you may have.

December 16, 2010
NCR WHQ 2 UD RI. From the outside looking in. From the inside looking out. Art, or some sort of security scanner, I`m not sure. Tomorrow, all the UD Flyers go home for a whole month!

December 17, 2010
A hint to those of you wondering what I want for Christmas. I had lunch today with the librarians. What a noisy bunch. I didn`t know what beef brisket was when I ordered it. I still don`t know, even though I just ate some. I grew up in one of those seats in the lower left corner. You need to figure out how to get my cheesecake in a box.

December 18, 2010
I never have enough time, so I went out and bought some. The idea is that this hourglass will motivate me to spend 60 minutes a day on a writing project I`ve been neglecting. Actually, after repeated tests, I`ve determined that this hourglass runs for 60 minutes and 55 seconds. Fortunately, I didn`t have to pay for the extra 55 seconds worth of sand. The hourglass was pretty reasonable, since it didn`t come with an expensive metal or wood frame. It usually doesn`t take me an hour to shoot five photos.

December 19, 2010
Put an animal on the endangered species list and they take advantage of it. Thanks for the warning. I`d hate to get hit by possible ice. It`s Christmastime in the city. Possible ice? With only a week before Christmas, I`m surprised he has time to attend the ballet.

December 20, 2010
Follow a path, or blaze a trail (and get your socks wet). Mary, did you know? The ice sculptures from December 9 still haven`t melted. Maybe next year. Snowblower accident.

December 21, 2010
If it`s any consolation, starting today the days get longer. Leftover art. I was going to quote the lyrics to `In My Solitude` here (there`s a line about a chair) but they`re too depressing. !raeY weN yppaH Wise men from the east, made out of nails.

December 22, 2010
This is in a display case near my office, so every day I hear people shout to their companions, `Look! It`s the world`s smallest nativity painted on the head of a nail!` My next photographic purchase: a model that never blinks. Maybe someday I`ll write one. My first Christmas present this year. You don`t want to see what I did to my finger.

December 23, 2010
Go easy -- those berries have to last all winter. Hope you brought your boots. An encouraging sign. Oblivion. Migrating south might have been a good idea.

December 24, 2010
Thanks to fast shipping, my latest photographic accessory arrived today. How can she breathe inside all that plastic? Is this day eleven? You can`t leave cookies for Santa without testing some. I`m not sure what visions of sugarplums actually look like. Though she`s not ready for a Rubik`s cube, this two-year-old seems extraordinarily bright.

December 25, 2010
Christmas tree abstract No. 47. No batteries, no fees. Grapes are good for you. Carrots are good for you. Always a tasteful gift.

December 26, 2010
I can admire them, but I still don`t like them. Designated driver. No really, I can stand. YOU sit down. What could it possibly be living off of? Frozen fish sticks? Combine sore ankles with brutal cold and a strangling scarf, and this child will grow up to hate winter like I do.

December 27, 2010
Today I photographed my first -- and last -- hockey game, or match, or scrum . . . whatever. This sport is too cold! Do you believe beavers were able to overcome knights? `Here, let me help you with that.` Despite all the padding, the goalie must have guts to just stand there and wait for the puck to come screaming in. Behind by one with two minutes to go, the coach subbed the goalie to gain another offensive player, but that only led to two empty net goals and a lopsided final score.

December 28, 2010
Feeling a little deflated during the holidays? Reflections of James Brown. What are you lookin` at? Can spring be far behind? This little box holds one terabyte of data, or approximately 29,585,798 copies of this photo.

December 29, 2010
Left by some frigid Flyer fan. All right, who colored on the wall? `Need a used camel? Very low mileage.` Golden grass. Do not pack a baby in bubble wrap.

December 30, 2010
Drive-in church. Ski Dayton! Spray can creativity. People live in this puddle. Should I worry that it`s pointing AWAY from me?

December 31, 2010
Today felt like spring, but the world was trapped in winter. There were several other people walking in the garden, including a photographer and model with no coats on. I wonder what the little black thingies are on the petals, and whether they grew there or were deposited by bugs. Natural and artificial designs blend harmoniously. As 2010 ends, I`ve now taken photos 2,412 days in a row.

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